Muhhhhh

My head and body are both completely fucked; what a party though. Just thought I’d post this comical gallery of everybody’s favourite jack the lad striker; Deano Windass…

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/gallery/2008/jun/05/deanwindass?picture=334613431

Personally the first one does it for me. Eurgh, work in a bit then more bodily destruction tonight – woohoo!

Football mathematics

So I embark on my top-ten’s. I thought an almost seasonal one to kick off (get it?!) with would have to be football. I’m narrowing it down to contemporary players because it’d get too messy otherwise, and I can’t be arsed to hear the ten thousand ‘Maradona is better than Pelé’ or visa-versa.

Now as previously mentioned this is my opinion, and yes favouritism will apply because what is opinion without it? Please feel free to whine and challenge in whatever way suits you best, just don’t create a free-for-all ’cause I’m not a fan. 

P.S. Please don’t bitch about the music in the videos! As much as I do enjoy watching them they aren’t made by me, and I personally wouldn’t dream of putting any of the following songs in!

 

10. Francesc “Cesc” Fàbregas Soler

Brought up through the Barcelona Youth Academy, Fàbregas is a twenty-one year old central midfielder who has become Arsenal’s most lethal playmaker. This Spanish international is one of the most exciting prospects in todays football and is already being compared to fellow Spanish legend Josep Guardiola.

Something that instantly strikes me about Fàbregas is how he instantly fits into the stereotypical Arsenal mould of ’skill over strength’. Rather then make huge tackles or exert himself unto other players Fàbregas prefers to pass and keep the tempo rolling - having one of the most important roles in the game helps him define exactly how Arsenal play. Admittedly Fàbregas wasn’t initially blessed with the scoring edge Arsenal are so fond of, but as he has aged he has progressed his game into a more aggressive style of football, yet still incorporating the traditional skill over style Arsenal have traditionally retained for so long. 

With his attacking powers unleashed it is no wonder that Fàbregas has become one of Arsenal’s set piece takers; the first choice free-kick and corner taker. In the future I can see Fàbregas become even more of a household name than he already is and really being one of the driving forces of football – a truly wonderful player.

 

9. Sergio Ramos García

This Spanish centre-half is still only twenty-two years of age yet in his remarkable three seasons at Real Madrid has scored a total of fourteen goals. Perhaps not impressive in comparison to your Rooney’s and Ronaldo’s, but for a twenty-two year old defender it say that its a damn good tally.

Ramos has everything you’d use when creating a perfect defender – his capability to play out-of-position roles (al’a full back and further up into defensive midfield), remarkable pace and the physical strength to make him an imposing threat to attackers. Pace seems to be one of Ramos’ strongest assets and I think this pretty much speaks for itself when you consider his outstanding runs up and down the right flank.

Ramos is still however very young, but that makes him all the more exciting when you consider just how far his abilities will increase with his age. A constant threat to opposing forwards and goalkeepers alike, Ramos is a versatile player whose style never fails to impress me – I’m just glad he never did become that bullfighter…

 

 

8. Javier Mascherano

Liverpool’s answer to Hargreaves. Alongside fellow Argentine Tevez created mass controversy with his transfer spectacularé, but unlike Tevez barely played for the Hammers – instead went straight to the kops.

Mascherano is not another ‘love of West Ham’ preach esque entry, far from it – he only played five games for us and at the time I really did not rate him. It wasn’t until Benetiz unveiled the true form that lied beneath this mysterious Argentine that I saw just what a player he really was. Swapping from club to club so frequently clearly didn’t damage Mascherano in the slightest as he maintains his inept ability as a defensive midfielder.

What I like about Mascherano’s playing style is his concept of the game. He can make the tackles, he can obstruct the forwards and create havoc in any area of the pitch – but with his perception of what the game around him it makes him a truly deadly player to face. Kudos to you Tommy!

 

 

7. Lionel Andrés Messi

Approaching his twenty-first birthday, Argentine starlet Messi has been hailed by Maradona as his “successor”. A cunning player who is able to play either on the wing or as a deep lying forward; he is Barcelona’s trump card.

Messi is the sort of versatile player who can completely swing a game in his teams favour. What I believe about Messi is that he is too relied on, and I know this obviously isn’t his fault, but I prefer watching teams that can play as a unite rather than an individual. Do not get me wrong, Messi is without a shadow of a doubt one of the best footballers ever, literately ever – I just don’t enjoy him as much as the previously mentioned.

You have to feel for Messi though, being diagnosed with growth hormone deficiency at the age of eleven isn’t nice for anybody. Clearly this hasn’t affected his career either, as he has come out as this literal football monster. I can see Messi maintaining his standard of play for a few years and then completely surpassing his own, and anybody else’s level – he just needs to find a team that he can play alongside and rely on as much as they will him.

 

 

6. Petr Čech

Petr Čech the guardian of Stamford Bridge. This Czech international currently holds three world records, a Czech professional league record of not conceding a goal in 855 competitive minutes, an English Premiership record of not conceding a goal in 1,025 minutes, and the most clean sheets accomplished in a single Premier League season (25), set during Chelsea’s 04/05 title-winning campaign.

Keepers are generally forgettable characters in football, yet they have arguably the hardest job in the game. Čech is a keeper who has come back after sustaining a savage injury via a brutal tackle from Reading’s Steven Hunt been able to play to the same, if not better, standard than before. Throughout the whole of this campaign he has been brilliant, I do not care what anybody says about him; being injury played and then coming on for massive matches with excellent performances. Not only is he an adapt keeper but also a true sportsman, even after being in a team with prima donna of the century Drogba, he still will run out of his box at site of any injury unheeding of the team.

As much as I despise Chelsea with every bone in my body I do not repent in saying that Petr Čech is a fucking awe inspiring footballer.

 

 

5. Carlos Tevez

Following what could possibly the most controversial transfer saga to date, at the beginning of the 07/08 season Argentine international Carlos Tevez signed the dotted line for Manchester United.

Tevez is my all time favourite player; end of. Being a West Ham fan, watching my clubs fate lie on the shoulders of one single player was an incredible experience; emphasised all the more so through his on pitch competence and proficiency. This man managed to save a team in need of saving in what seemed a completely impossible situation, despite being ignored by former manager Alan Pardew. To also have the grace to come back on pitch as a respected player and give a brilliantly dignified response just goes to show why my love of this player is so substantial – oh, and not to mention he is a shitting good player too.

What I first noticed about Tevez is his confidence, despite not being the most imposing striker he is still able to fight through defenders until the very last minute, never afraid to take a shot in the most diverse situations – which usually hit those fine white lines. His inclination for the game is also outstanding, Tevez is an intelligent player who can read out situations well, an example is his supporting of Rooney despite predominantly playing a centre forward role himself. Not only that, but he is also one of the most hard working players we have to date and truly gives his all which is shown through his consistency on the pitch and personal reactions.

Tevez is a fine player, and I expect much more will come of this, as quoted by Diego Maradona, “Argentine prophet for the 21st century”.

 

 

4. Daniel Alves da Silva

A Brazilian right back capable of playing on the right wing too. Alves plays for Sevillia where he is most probably most remembered for his public war of words against the Sevilla president Jose Maria Del Nido due to Alves’ dream to move and Del Nido’s urgency to keeping the best players he can for the mediocre Sevillia.

What I like most about Alves is his complexity when playing. Due to his adapt ability to play dual roles he becomes a real threat to both strikers and defenders alike. Possessing the burlesque stature of the stereotypical full back yet combining the physique of a modern day winger makes him a truly minatory opponent.

A lot of people proclaim he isn’t the player that they expected him to become, yet I really cannot comprehend this; if anything he is much more developed and superior to what I assumed anyway. Rumours are flying all over the place that United are interested in signing him as a replacement Neville – if true, United truly will have the best defence in footballing history.

 

 

3. Cristiano Ronaldo dos Santos Aveiro

This Portuguese international really needs no introduction, known throughout the world as Ronaldo, this versitile young man is capable of playing either as a dual sided winger or even up front. Currently playing at Manchester United where he recently surpassed former United legend George Best’s thirty-two goal record as a midfielder and fell short by two of other united forward legend Ruud Van Nistelrooy’s by two.

Now Ronaldo was unavoidable in making an appearance in this list, and I’m sure a lot of you are in shock that he isn’t number one. An underlying reason for this is his inconsistency, with the amount of chances he makes it is simply inevitable that he will score, but I personally believe he should score more.

What I like most about Ronaldo is his cockiness. Now a lot of people happily slander him for this, yet I think it adds to his character – compare him to fellow winger and team mate Giggs; Ronaldo is more entertaining. His ability by far compensates this as well, I feel that it contributes toward his style. Another thing I really enjoy about Ronaldo is how we, the fans, have been able to watch him mature and grow. Ferguson signed him and immediately gave him the heroic No.7 jersey, this sparked off so much hysteria about a player who was literately unknown. Perhaps this spurred Ronaldo on into playing with the elegance he is so gifted with today, almost a talisman baring his true talent.

He is a Marmite amongst footballers, loved or hated by the millions. I however love him, world cup incident aside, he is a beautiful footballer and has given football a face again. 

 

 

2. Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite

Known to the majority simply as Kaká. This twenty-six year old attacking midfielder currently plays for A.C. Milan where he’s met the net 54 times, as well as his national team Brazil.

Now a lot of people will argue over this, naming Kaká over Ronaldo ‘n all – however I do have to disagree. Kaká is such a rare sportsman, someone who is so quaint yet so tactful with a football at his feet; a true role model. Kaká’s openness to religion and avoidance of tabloid debaucheries truly make him an inspiration when compared to ninety-percent of his competitors.

His playing style is also something to be in awe of, his capability to maintain a ball perfectly whilst undergoing constant attacks from teams that solely focus on attacking him is incredible. Definitely blessed with pace, all the skills and tricks (which, are what seem to credit toward a players likeability these days) as well as the sheer dominance over the net; combining Brazilian flair with European directness  -  Kaká simply is one of the best, a true gentlemen amongst footballers.

 

 

1. Sergio Leonel “Kún” Agüero del Castillo

Better known as Sergio Aguero or “Kún” to the Spaniards and Argentineans, the 19-year old starlet from Argentina currently playing for Atlético Madrid.

Now I do not care what anybody says here. You can sit back and moan on about how it should be Ronaldo, Messi or Kaka – no. Agüero is without a doubt the finest striker the world has seen in a long time. We have been stuck with Rooney and Eto’os’ wearisome performances for too long now and it is time we all moved on and realised that there is talent outside what we know.

Agüero not only possesses incredible pace, but also impeccable shooting capabilities and an overall superb interception of the game as a whole. What adds to my profounded likening of this particular player is his age – 19 years old and the third highest goal scorer in one of the best leagues the world has to offer! After having such a poor previous season where he was frequently neglected for Mista, he has come back despite all the controversy over his talent and teamed up with a completely foreign player (Forlan) and created this prolific partnership in which he has truly shown his true abilities.

Agüero deserves my No.1 spot, just as much as he deserved the Antonio Puerta Award for the Best “La Liga” player for the 07/08 season that he recently won. All I can say is wait until Agüero reaches his peak; I’d sure hate to be a keeper.